Jamyang Rinpoche
Living in this world, there will always be suffering, happiness, emotions, worries and other thoughts. When we experience suffering or unpleasant situations, we often attribute it to external causes.
For example, if I'm feeling sad today, there must be an external cause; maybe it is a friend upsetting me, a colleague criticizing me, or my boss picking on me. There are many types of causes, largely stemming from competitiveness and conflicts between people.
We think that our unhappiness is caused by the “other person" and that they will never admit to their faults. Thinking this way makes us wish for revenge or other forms of confrontation which only deepens our suffering and makes life feel even more barren.
The principle of Buddhism is to first change our own mind, rather than demanding that others do so. If we want to remove a tree, pulling off its leaves and branches will never work. We can do it year after year but the tree grows back the following year. Why? Because the roots are still alive.
The same principle applies to our sufferings. We will never finish dealing with all the problems in the world. We will never end all problems by trying to fend it off from the outside. It is only possible if we cut off the root of our suffering, just like cutting off the roots of a tree. When the roots are gone, the leaves and branches won't grow back, and the tree will die out.
Similarly, we can’t get the satisfaction or happiness we wish for just by resolving the various sufferings in our lives. We might try to manage our relationships with others, working through the problems in our lives but never find true happiness or satisfaction. We overcome one obstacle only to find another, and then another. True satisfaction always remains out of reach.
Take a simple example from daily life: a family's monthly salary might initially be a few thousand yuan —enough to cover food and basic expenses. Later, the family members get a raise and might be earning ten or twenty thousand yuan a month. Yet, they don’t feel like they have enough money despite the better conditions than before. What is the reason? Their greed has grown larger. They start to desire a better house, a better car, better food, and so on.
Many people want to live in a big house, believing that a large home will make them feel happier. Then consider going to the beach. You can sit on the vast, empty beach for as long as you want, and no one will bother you.
But we feel that "this beach doesn't belong to me." A sense of "self" arises. "The house belongs to me, the beach doesn't."
In reality, is there any difference between sitting at the beach for two or three hours and sitting at home for two or three hours? It's the same amount of time, and two hours of life have passed in both cases.
Due to a feeling of attachment, we think "this is my house," and feel a sense of security, while "the beach doesn't belong to me, it belongs to the country, and however big it is makes no difference to me." Due to making such distinctions in our mind, we feel differently.
In the example given above, when our income increases, we think about moving to a bigger house. When we do that, the monthly payments, electricity bills, water bills, and various other expenses increase — these are things that weren't a mental burden to us before.
If our financial situation improves further, then one house isn't enough, we want to buy a second and third house... The greater the greed, the more the suffering, and the less time and freedom you have.
Even if the house is paid for in full without a loan, there are still potential issues like leaks, repairs, renovations and other problems that worry us. Observe for yourself, one house, two houses, the suffering just keeps piling up...
What did Patrul Rinpoche say? “Owning a brick of tea brings the afflictions of (owning) a brick of tea; owning a horse brings the suffering of (owning) a horse; owning a sheep brings the suffering of (owning) a sheep..."
We can use any object to examine this. For example, compare a new (mobile) phone you just bought to an old phone and observe how different it feels to you. How much anguish do you feel when you drop a new phone? An old phone is already battered and used, so dropping it doesn't cause much suffering.
All suffering comes from the way our own minds work. You can’t avoid the suffering that arises from the choices we make with attachment, aversion or delusion. Because our very own mind created it. So-called loved ones, happiness, suffering and so forth are all generated by our minds.
That's why we need to keep learning Dharma to address our own mind. It is like cutting off the roots of a tree, then the leaves and branches will naturally die. In the same way, the true cause of all suffering, sorrow and afflictions does not come from the external world as we believe. The real cause is the discriminating thoughts of our minds.
The attachments and discriminations created in our mind lead to afflictions. Therefore, when we change our minds, the external environment will naturally change with it.
For example, some people are kind and magnanimous. They are accepting of any situation. Wherever he goes, others are seldom able to pollute his state of mind. He will not feel much disturbing emotions. He is always smiling and cheerful wherever he is because his mind can accommodate anything.
In contrast, people with petty, narrow, and jealous minds will experience a lot of resistance and suffering everywhere, even when just having a meal with family, let alone with colleagues or classmates. He feels competitive and jealous even for a good seating. His state of mind is the cause of innumerable sufferings for him.
